


What Hurts the Most

by holi2005



Series: Ed/Roy post-CoS [1]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Angst, Bad English, M/M, slight spoilers for CoS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-11
Updated: 2013-05-11
Packaged: 2017-12-11 13:14:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/799134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holi2005/pseuds/holi2005
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thinking about all the things that could had been better... My summaries are terrifying. Just read it. It's angst. For now it's a oneshot (could become more if anyone's interested). I was challenged by a friend of mine to write a songfic around "What hurts the most" with pairing from Fullmetal Alchemist (she wanted a Roy/Havok one but...)<br/>Warnings: Angst? Vague references concerning M/M. Bad English...</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Hurts the Most

Too much time has passed since I lost you. I admit that I've shed a few tears here and there. While I'm getting used to the loneliness that chokes me these days, it's still the small things that truly get me. Sometimes I can alomst say that I'm fine without feeling like I'm swallowing glass.  
What actually terrifies me is that small part of my mind(heart,soul) that screams at me during every waking moment(and some of my most recent, most heart-shattering nightmares) that just a few words from me could have changed the outcome. That maybe during those last moments we shared(and that I shall cherish until the day I die) there was a spark in your eyes that promised so much if only I have the courage to reach out to you.  
Those two years of self-exile in that frozen hell may have been very hard on me, but I always had a small hope that you would come back to Alphonse, to Winry, to... me. But now, watching while everyone else settle and move on with their lives, I realize that the hell has just begun.  
What hurts the most is the fact that I was this close to getting my happy ending. Sadly, my sense of duty(fear), would have never allowed me to ask(beg) you to stay, knowing that it would had left our whole world wide open to another invasion. The knowledge that I'll never know what it could have been like to wake up next to you every morning; make love to you every night.  
So while I do my duty, while my heart turns to dust and drifts away, the only thing I'll think about is that all I was trying to do was love you.

**Author's Note:**

> Please read and comment...? Kisses A.A.N.


End file.
